I want to go home…

We all have days when everyone seems to be against us and wants us to fail in ever way possible. Living in Mount Druitt, this is every single day. I couldn’t go to work today, because I was just short of fare for the bus. I pleaded with the driver to let me on the bus, but he told me to get off of “his” bus. I called work an told them that if I went to the nearest ATM (a 45 minute bike ride away), I wouldn’t be able to get to work until around 5:00, which would mean that my usual 4 1/2 hour shift would be 3 hours instead. I offered to come in on Thursday instead when the boss said no to me coming in later today. She said it was too late and to just come in at my usual time tomorrow. Now, that isn’t necessarily here in Druitt, but I was here, so it still counts for me. Now, the people that I have mentioned are out to get everyone and everything in front of them. I decided to go out to the plaza (that 45 minute ride I mentioned) to get money for fares and also food for tonight. Every fifteen seconds or so, I would have to weave around someone standing in the sidewalk attempting to play chicken with me. At one point, there was a kid that completely blocked my path with his own bike. His front tire was at the edge of the road, his back tire touching a fence, forcing me to either stop or go into the heavy traffic on the road. I stopped and said, “Well, aren’t you special?” and proceeded to shove his bike out of the way with my front tire. It wasn’t that hard, considering he was on a tiny bmx bike and I was on a towering mountain bike. I normally woul have just waited fo him to move his dumb ass, but I know how the kids over here work. They lure you in and then jump you for everything you have. So I shoved him out of the way, bike to bike. Another portion of the ride through hell was spent listening to jeers from people in their cars and watching middle fingers flying like Hitchcocks birds, in density and speed. It was a constant tirade of this. After while, I started wondering if it was something I was wearing that was offending these people. I looked down at myself and realized that I was dressed as normal as I’ve ever dressed, which can actually be very normal, thank you very much. So it couldn’t be the clothes I was wearing. Were they hating me so openly because I was on a bike and they hated me because they had better transport? I know that makes no sense whatsoever, but it would not surprise me much over here. And that was my entire ride through Mount Druitt, and so has been every ride through the Druitt since I got here. I want out. I’m so sick of everything here, but I won’t go home without Kendall. That’s really all there is to it, I just want to go home, but if Kendall isn’t there, it’s not home. Unfortunately, Australia is neither my nor is it Kendall’s home, so though we are together here, neither of us are home.


Fun with recording!

Well, as some of you may know, I’ve been trying to record a few songs, just for the fun of it. Out of the ten tracks with guitar on the album, I have successfully recorded (and in a couple of cases, butchered) six of them! The list is as such:

Stockholm Syndrome
Safe to Dream
Watch Me
The Summoning
Damien’s Vault

I still need to learn how to actually master the guitars and everything, though. I usually have somewhere between 2 to 6 guitars going at once, and that can cause everything to get a little muddy. What I want to accomplish is something like Don’t Tread on Me from Metallica. If you listen to the intro of the song, you really can’t tell that there are six guitars going all at once. They sound so good! And everything is so crystal clear! That’s what I want to be able to do. Damien’s Vault is going to be extremely difficult, because even before I start to mast everything, I have to consolidate all of the guitars down to 8 or so tracks. Right now, there is an excess of 224 tracks, 219 of them are guitars. I was playing with the hard limiter (compression, really) last night, and I still have no idea what I’m doing.

Sick again…

So it was raining yesterday. It was fairly cold and windy, too. Remember that 1k walk home from the bus stop that I’ve mentioned? Yeah, I was completely soaked before five minutes had passed. And of course, it was windy and chilly, so I was freezing by the time I got back to the caravan. And I now feel like shit. I feel absolutely terrible. I’m very warm and my throat and sinuses hurt. I don’t want to call in today, because they asked me to come in two hours early, and with the extra hour that I worked yesterday, that would be a total of $54 extra in my paycheck. But, on the other hand, if I’m sick, I can’t go in because, hey, I work in CATERING in a HOSPITAL. Being sick and working in catering is not a good idea. Being sick and working in a hospital is a worse idea. Being sick and working in the catering department of a hospital is bad. Very bad. Terrible, in fact.

But I still don’t know if I should call in. I don’t want any repercussions for calling in. I haven’t missed any days yet, and I’m proud of that. I’ve always had good attendance records, even if my performance hasn’t been all that great, but here at the hospital, my manager and coworkers think I’m doing a great job. So we have my perfect attendance and my great performance on the line. But I’m also sick. Dammit, why is this so hard?!