I hate and am sick of

People suggesting I declare bankruptcy to solve my issues with hospital debt.

That being said, I got my bill yesterday in the mail. $47,004.91 for my pleurodesis. My mom had a radical hysterectomy 14 years ago (in 1997…I suddenly feel really old…) and that cost her 2/3 of that. Her bill, to have an 8 hour surgery to remove her cancer and all of her lady-bits cost $32,000, while having the outside of my lung scuffed up cost $15,000 more? Sorry, that just doesn’t make much sense to me.

If anyone feels like getting indignant about me being angry about my bill costing more than a cancer-removal bill, my mom feels the same way I do, and it was her cancer being removed.

Back to my main point, that being declaring bankruptcy, so many people have suggested – willy-nilly, mind you – that I do so just to absolve my hospital bills. Two things pass through my mind immediately after hearing/seeing those words, and I shall dramatically reenact them with ragefaces:

Quickly followed by:

Reason being; I already have shit credit. I know, I know, you’re not really supposed to talk about your credit, but whatever. My credit is shit, because of the $20,000 I already owed the hospital from a few years ago, as well as a $1,000 debt to SunTrust from a few years ago, so if I declared bankruptcy, I’d be fucked for pretty much the rest of my life.

Now, the person of whom I’m speaking, the one who just suggested bankruptcy to me, she suggested this just after I mentioned that I am one notarized sheet of paper away from this: http://www.browardhealth.org/news/?sid=2&nid=648

Now, if you actually read through that, good for you. If you also understood it, pretty fucking sweet, eh? If you didn’t under stand it, you see you it says “charity” quite a lot in there? Well, the entire system is basically like this:

Me: “I have no money, oh noes!”

Government Man (Come from the Government): “That is not a problem!” (reaches into community chest/tax pile and pulls out a wad of money) “Here is enough money to pay off your last six months of hospital bills!” (hands wad of happy-paper to hospital)

So, a one time use free lunch/get out of jail free card, basically. Yeah, it comes out of community taxes, but that’s why I’d do my damnedest to make sure that it’s a one time thing.

So after I mentioned that I’m one notarized sheet of paper away from said out-of-jail-free card, she suggests bankruptcy.

Yes. I am going to fuck myself up for the rest of my life when I have the possibility of paying off almost everything I have ever owed to this hospital. I’ve already been told that if I can pay a lump-sum of $800, then my old debt from a few years ago will be taken care of in total and I won’t owe anything more for it. So, if I can get this one sheet of paper notarized and handed into the hospital along with $800, I’m home free with my grand spanking total of around $68,000 GONE.

YES. LET ME DECLARE BANKRUPTCY THIS INSTANT.

I reiterate:

Quickly followed by:

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“Hot Coffee Is Hot”

When I was growing up, the biggest joke when looking at any kind of packaging was “Do not use while sleeping”. Of course, this was a joke because, unless you’re sleepwalking, it’s quite impossible to blow dry your hair, and even if you are sleepwalking, there’s nothing you can do about it at the time, because you’re asleep.
Now I’m finding packages of peanuts that proclaim that this package “May contain nuts”. Packs of carrots have an ingredients list that consists of, “Carrots”. Beverage containers from fast food places have warnings stating that, “Hot coffee is hot”.
When I see these warnings and ingredient lists, I have to wonder just how far we have gone. Sure, we have scientists working around the clock, trying to fully understand our universe, but these people are running fewer and further between and are studying things which cannot be proven until they do or do not happen, such as the anthropic principle.
Are these warning really necessary? Do people really need to be told that carrots are carrots and that when something is steaming it’s hot? Do people who are allergic to nuts really need to be told that this package contains nuts when the package itself says “Mixed Nuts”?
I heard a joke a few years ago, stating that if we removed all warning labels, the problems with the average level of intelligence would take care of itself. I don’t think I’ve ever agreed with anything as vehemently as that. My faith in humanity has reached such a low point that I would love to see the list of runner-ups for the Darwin Awards skyrocket, as I have no doubt it would if we removed the warning labels.
In conclusion, hot coffee is hot, carrots are carrots, cashews are cashews and common sense is less common than I could ever have known.