just a random update

I’m totally waiting for my library card right now. I’ll finally be able to get books and not get yelled at for reading four plus chapters while at the book store and actually finishing the book without buying it!**

My subconcious and my body are duking it out right now, all egged on be my concious brain. Because my subconcious is constantly sitting there going, “No, you really do have COPD”, my body is reacting as though I do. My concious brain, on the other hand, is completely aware that when I went to the hospital for shortness of breath, the doctors told me that I am one of the healthiest people that they’ve seen coming in for SoB. So, my brain and body are currently duking it out. My fingernails are going back and forth between a healthy pink and a rather unhealthy purple colour, as is the skin on my hands (knuckles, palms, and such). The one main thing that is really keeping me sane, besides Kendall, of course, is the fact that a lot of times, I’ll go to yawn, and without even taking a full breath (really just a tiny puff of an inhalation) and I’ll get that feeling of “I just took a complete breath”.

It’s really a very confusing and agitating process.

**I’ve done this twice, now…

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